February 28, 2003
Real Estate Agents
You often read about the extraordinary way real estate agents abuse the English Language in advertisements. We have just received a letter from an agent who wants to sell our house and he could even put Joe Bonkers-Bananas (former premier of Queensland) to shame. Joe is (probably inaccurately) famous for the phrase; "I smell a rat, I see it floating in the air, I shall nip it in the bud", which makes sense only if you ignore the metaphors and look at the meaning and context.
Our friendly agent writes: "... timing is everything and it is important to act now while the iron is hot in a market that is boiling over with activity".
Let's take a moment with that phrase:
- Timing is everything = Only fools rush in, look before you leap, consider carefully what you are doing because otherwise a hasty decision could lead to later regrets.
- It is important to act now = He who hesitates is lost. If you delay the opportunity is gone, immediate response required.
- The iron is hot = best time to strike (or is that to go on strike), if you delay everything shatters - which may actually be helpful as the house would be demolished to build units.
- The market is boiling over = frantic activity which is not achieving anything (as in the milk which boils over is spoiled), also suggests may be too late and market will come off the heat for cooling.
The strangest part is the mixing of the hot iron and the boiling market. I suspect that molten (boiling) iron is far too hot for striking and in fact all that overflowing, boiling iron probably creates a situation that is far too dangerous for a mere house owner :grin.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 27, 2003
Umbrellas and rain
What was that saying about the rain?
The rain, it raineth on the just,
And the unjust fellow,
But mainly on the just, because
The unjust has the justs umbrella!
This morning on the bus I was subject to a walk-by umbrella snatch but fortunately it was too crowded and I was hanging onto the umbrella too well...
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 26, 2003
What phone?
Lovely story from the UK about phone boxes. Just imagine this:
BT #1: How do you identify a phone box?
BT #2: Well obviously it is a box with a phone in it.
BT #1: No. I mean seriously, how do you keep an inventory of them?
BT #2: You need a serial number.
BT #1: Why not use the phone number of the phone in the box.
BT #2: Brilliant, but what if there was no phone in the box?
BT #1: Well obviously it isn't a phone box, is it?
So the story is that some vandels (or goths or visagoths or some other barbarian invaders) removed the phone from the phone box. It cannot be repaired or replaced because it no longer exists.
That's right, it has no identifiable serial number and therefore it is not a phone box. It is merely an ... wait for it ... Xbox.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 25, 2003
Another trip to the iLoo
Boy this must belong to the "there's no such thing as bad publicity" category. A quick sequence review is in order:
Step 1 - Put out a press release about a crappy product - everyone laughs at you.
Step 2 - Claim that the press release is a April Fool's hoax even though it was release in May - everyone laughs at you.
Step 3 - Recant the hoax claim and claim that it was marketing strategy - everyone looks really confused.
That's right. Apparently the iLoo is/was/might be real. The recant of the hoax (which happened between when the previous article was written and when it was posted) story is being carried on a number of web sites including: Wired News, The Register, and News is Crappy. Also see another article on The Register.
Can we just all agree that Microslash iLoo stinks and get on with it?
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 24, 2003
iLoo Reflushed
Let's imagine that you had a big company that made crappy products and somebody put out a story about the iLoo. There are a few different responses that you could use. You could ignore it and wait for it to go away. You could jump up and down and lose your temper. Or you could make a complete fool out of yourself.
Apparently the iLoo story which appeared via Microslosh UK was supposed to be an April Fools prank. Small problem with this scenario - it wasn't released in April. In fact there was no indication at all that this was a prank. Everything (including official spokespersons) was consistent with it being a real story. Nevertheless, Microslash expect you to believe that they got their months (and days) mixed up and released an April Fools story in May.
The real story is probably more like this:
Microserf 1: A lot of people are making fun of our new iLoo.
Microserf 2: I don't care, I like surfing while I am on the throne for my 5 minutes alloted toilet break every third day.
Microserf 1: Yes but people are laughing at us.
Microserf 2: Just tell them it was an April Fool's joke.
Microserf 1: But it's not April.
Microserf 2: It is if we say it is!
Oh well, no more potty jokes about crappy software please!
Followup story from AtAT as well (much funnier than anything I can do):
Remember the MSN iLoo? Well, faithful viewer Enrique Gomez tipped us off to an Associated Press article in which Microsoft claims that the whole project was just a hoax, despite the fact that the company's own PR people have repeatedly confirmed that it's real. The thing is, if it was a hoax, it still originated from Microsoft-- there's the official press release, after all, which at broadcast time had yet to be yanked from microsoft.com. Maybe faithful viewer Pat Chekal was right last week when he surmised that it was just an April Fools joke that didn't make it out the door until May; "only five weeks late-- that's way ahead of the usual Microsoft delivery lag." That's certainly possible, we suppose, but to us this whole "it was a hoax" thing smells like classic Microsoft revisionism, à la "those faked tapes we entered into evidence were actually just meant to be an 'illustration.'" After all, if you announced a product that spawned a solid week of ridicule from every sentient being on the planet, wouldn't you like to pretend it was all a joke?
Another variation can be found at "The Register". Also at ABCNews.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 23, 2003
Yo PC ain't so fast now!
Anyone remember the infamous floating point pentium bug? Of course not, that was ancient history (in the IT world that means more than 10 years ago). Well apparently a modern sucessor has been found in the Itanium (which was supposed to be the Sexium or something similar).
Don't panic. There is a simple solution. Just run the computer slower. A lot slower. Then nothing can go wrong.
Best advice really. If you are having problems with your PC, give it a try. Slow down until you stop altogether. Switch it off to save power. Now nothing can go wrong....
Now, all together: Here's a nickel son, get yourself a real computer!
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 22, 2003
Magic Roundabouts
This was sent to me by Theepan and my immediate reaction was complete disbelief. I figured that putting this up on the website (even as a joke) would make me a laughing stock. Anyway, I decided to check with my favourite (only) English brother-in-law and he confirmed that these accidents-waiting-to-happen do really exist.
Story from Theepan:
Ok, imagine you have to drive your car in Britain, and you're less than enthusiastic about it, since you only recently got your drivers license, and you'll have to drive on the left lane. And then you see this:
You're starting to wonder what that's about. You didn't see anything like this at your driving lessons. And a bit further, you stumble across this situation:
The magic roundabout! Birds eye view.... This ones in Swindon, between London and Cardif. In the outer roundabouts you turn clockwise, in the centre you turn counterclockwise. As you can see, the trafic problem is essentially solved by scaring people into taking alternative routes.
Well after sending a copy, I got this reply:
We do indeed have the Magic Roundabouts - I avoid them like the plague! There is one I cannot escape however, at Heathrow Airport on the perimeter road between Terminal 4 and the other terminals. Just what you need as a foreign visitor in your hire car setting out to navigate on the "wrong" side of the road for anyone from the US or EU country! They are a nightmare sorting out priority and/or direction.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 21, 2003
Lions will eat anything
A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.
The first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. He starts on this when suddenly a huge fish leaps out and bites him. He is not going to let a fish have a go so he beats the offending fish to death with a spade. Realising that his boss is not going to be best pleased, he tries to find a way to hide the dead fish. He hits on the brilliant idea of giving the fish to the lions because lions will eat anything. So he throws the fish into the lion's cage.
He then moves on to his second job, which is to clear out the monkey house. He goes in and a couple of chimps start throwing coconuts at him. Un-amused he swipes at the chimps with his spade, killing them instantly. He's really worried now, so what does he do? He feeds the chimps to the lions, because lions eat anything. He hurls them into the lion's cage.
Anyway, he moves on to his last job, which is to collect honey from South American bees. He starts on this and quickly gets attacked by the bees. Alarmed, he grabs his spade and smashes the bees as hard as he can, squashing them to death. By this point he is not too worried about the death of bees as he knows what to do by now. He throws them into the lion's cage, becauselions eat anything.
Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. It wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like in here?".
The other lion says: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees".
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (2)
February 20, 2003
Big News of the Week
Just when things have started to slow down ...
Just when things are getting nice and quiet ...
Just when you thought it was safe to get back in the water ...
The boogeyman is back - Microslash has another vulnerability. Just a lttle one. Doesn't really affect anyone. Unless of course they happen to have a Microsoft passport. Or a hotmail account. Or Windows. Or Office. Or just about anything that uses Microslosh software.
Don't panic. It's not like a real serious problem. It's not like you really care. I mean this doesn't affect your email? Oh it does. Sorry about that. But your credit cards are safe. Oh they aren't.
You see anyone can change your password. Anytime. To anything. All they need is your email address and a carefully constructed URL which could be put together by a PC user ...
Don't worry, sounds like WAD (Working As Designed) to me.
I mean if you really cared then you would ....
(All togther please)...
HERE'S A NICKLE SON, GET YOURSELF A REAL COMPUTER
Links for the curious can be found all over the place including the following articles: Wired News, SecurityFocus and best of all at The Register which outlines the potential penalty of $US2trillion which out to go a long way to helping the US budget blowout.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 19, 2003
Lift vs Elevator
A conversation in the lift on the way home from work reminded me of an old joke. This was reinforced by a casual comment about the way I spelt "colour" in an email to a friend.
There was an American who, at least for this joke, was staying at a posh hotel in London. He was a self-made man, wealthy and proud of his heritage. Having checked in, he decided to sample the cuisine but was somewhat disoriented by the different method used for counting floors. After asking, the concierge directed him to the "elevator".
Possibly because of the earlier confusion, the somewhat disgruntled guest decided to correct the hotel employee: "You mean lift, don't you?".
"No", responded the concierge, who was not prepared to be corrected by a mere American, regardless of wealth, "I meant elevator!".
The guest frowned and growled in reply: "We invented the darn things and we can call them whatever we like!"
"Certainly sir!", came the quick reply, "but don't forget WE invented the language".
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 18, 2003
Microslash gets it right...
An entry on Apple Turns led to a story on WebUser about the latest Microslash product: iLoo. Yup. It's a portaloo running windows. Well not literally running windows, I'd hate to have a BSOD (blue screen of death) while trying to flush.
Apparently the loo has a windows screen/keyboard/mouse so you can browse the net while doing whatever you came to do.
Maybe this is to compensate for those who like to read while sitting on the throne. AtAT have alternative suggestions but they also pointed out that there could be a real problem with hygiene. Maybe the Microslash people should check out this article about the SARS virus.
Now, maybe we could predict what sort of porn web sites would be accessed and add a chargeback mechanism :wink.
In case the links age out, here is the image (from WebUser):
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (2)
February 17, 2003
England vs France
[EDITOR: This story may have originated from another site. The oldest reference found so far can be viewed here.]
This one is from Pat again:
Three guys - an Englishman, a Frenchman and a Welshman - are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it.
"I will give you each one wish" says the genie.
The Welshman says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Wales."
With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in Wales was forever made fertile for farming. The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country."
Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France. The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this
wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out."
The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water."
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 16, 2003
Golden Phones
This one is from one of my (many) brothers:
An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North.
On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read "$10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way.
Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the American.
He then traveled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it.
The American, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to AUSTRALIA to see if Australians had the same phone. He arrived in Australia, and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "30 cents per call."
The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in the US the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?"
The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Australia now, son - it's a local call".
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 15, 2003
Iraqi Information Minister
Has apparently got a new job. According to "We Love the Iraqi Information Manager" he has been receiving job offers right, left and centre since failing in his attempt to surrender to the American troops in the field - I guess like the Iraqi people, they just didn't believe a word he said.
Anyway, the best job we say was this one: Tech Support at Microslosh.
"Bugs? There are no bugs. We have destroyed two bugs, two anomalies, and a misspelling. We have driven them back. I guarantee you, there are no bugs in our software. Those who say "there are bugs," (dramatic pause) THEY are the bugs. All they tell is lies, lies, and more lies! - Thank you for calling Microslosh support. (click)" (sent by Richard Berry)
Apparently he is also acting as a spokesman (sent by Gary Jukes):
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 14, 2003
Virus Alert
Theepan's best forward yet:
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 13, 2003
Another French story...
From Theepan again ...
Two expatriots were working in Saudi Arabia, one French and one English. After a long period with no alcohol they decided to celebrate and smuggled in a couple of cartons of beer. Suddenly the Saudi police appear and arrest them.
The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offence in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they are both sentenced to death!
However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they are able to successfully appeal their sentences down to life imprisonment.
By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheikh decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip.
As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheikh announced: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."
The Frenchman was first in line, he thought for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. When the punishment was done he had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain.
The Englishman was the last one up, but before he could say anything, the Sheikh turned to him and said: "You are from a most beautiful part of the world and your culture is one of the finest in the world. For this, you may have two wishes!" "Thank you, your Most Royal and Merciful highness", the Englishman replied. In recognition of your kindness,my first wish is that you give me not 20 lashes but, 100 lashes."
"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man, you are also very brave". The Sheikh said with an admiring look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish"?
"Tie the Frenchman to my back."
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 12, 2003
Two clocks ...
Column 8 on tuesday had a lovely short piece on the railway station with two clocks, each showing a different time. When a passenger complained the attendant responded: "And why, would you be needing two clocks if they're showing the same time?".
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 11, 2003
Space shuttle & horses
Theepan has been trying to cheer me up - must be because I am getting old. One year closer to retirement today!
This one is an urban legend which is unfortunately not true but sounds good anyway. For a detailed discussion of the merits of the story check out www.snopes.com - the Urban Legends Reference Pages.
Story follows:
Does the statement, "We've always done it that way" ring any bells...?
The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number.
Why was that gauge used?
Because that's the way they built them in England, and English expatriates built the US Railroads.
Why did the English build them like that?
Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.
Why did "they" use that gauge then?
Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.
Okay! Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing?
Well, if they tried to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England, because that's the spacing of the wheel ruts.
So who built those old rutted roads?
Imperial Rome built the first long distance roads in Europe (and England) for their legions. The roads have been used ever since.
And the ruts in the roads?
Roman war chariots formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing.
The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches is derived from the original specifications for an Imperial Roman war chariot. And bureaucracies live forever. So the next time you are handed a spec and told we have always done it that way and wonder what horse's ass came up with that, you may be exactly right, because the Imperial Roman war chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.
Now the twist to the story...
When you see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters, or SRBs.Thiokol makes the SRBs at their factory in Utah.
The engineers who designed the SRBs would have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line from the factory happens to run through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track, as you now know, is about as wide as two horses' behinds. So, a major Space Shuttle design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a horse's ass.
And you thought being a horse's ass wasn't important!!!
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 10, 2003
The French
[Send by Gray Monk...]
One English aristocrat remarkied to a crony in 1788 "The French are revolting" ...
... and his friend replied "I agree!" Ce la vie!
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 09, 2003
Set a thief ...
Once upon a time there was a popular theory that suggested "set a thief to catch a thief". As mentioned in a comment last week by Blaine, there has been some discussion about the very strange suggestion that Microslosh is going to be teaching "Programming & Security" to undergraduates at a number of universities.
On second thoughts, this is not really the same thing. The thief idea is based on finding a very good thief who can then catch other thieves. The Microslosh idea is based on the premise that you take someone with absolutely no idea whatsoever (as demonstrated by a complete inability to write secure code) and use them to terrify undergraduates into thinking that this is normal!
What next? Teaching CompSci students to use Microslosh tools and systems instead of writing their own?
[Put on white beard, stoop and add quaver to voice] I can remember when I went to uni ... and it was a real uni ... not one of these jumped up CAE thingys ... and we only had a PDP to play on and there were hundreds of us fighting to use VT100s ... lovely screens ... when I was in third year I got to use an orange one instead of a green one ... that's the colour of the text not the case ... now where was I? ... Oh yes, I was rambling pointlessly.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 08, 2003
Not the war...
From column 8 in the SMH:
US forces have swooped on an Iraqi primary school and detained a teacher. He was in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare and a calculator - clear evidence that Iraq has weapons of maths instruction.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 07, 2003
You look familiar...
Tonight's story was overhead in a restaurant in Coogee. At the next table were a couple of sportsmen - one an Aussie, one a Kiwi swapping stories about overseas trips representing their respective countries. The Aussie told a story about a swanky restaurant in the USA where the tables were arranged in rows and filled from one side of the room to the other (I remember something similar in Germany/Austria). The entire Aussie team were seated along one side of the table with a couple of Kiwi mates at the end furthest from the door. They were all indulging in a bit of the amber nectar when a well built (chubby) fellow slipped in opposite them and started sliding along the bench to the end.
As he sat down the first Aussie said: "Gday mate, you look at bit familiar". As he slid along the next one said "Oweryagoin Oright? I seen you before somewhere". And so it continued with each Aussie professing some faint glimer of recognition but not particularly concerned with identification until the stranger drew level with the first Kiwi who said: "Hang on, I reckon you're on the television". The second Kiwi agreed: "Ain't you that Drew Carey bloke?"
Says something about the Australian sportsman. A mere tv celebrity and comic is nothing to get excited about. Not like say scoring a goal (= touchdown for Americans? or is that a putdown?).
Of course I know a Kiwi who will also point out the relative intelligence of the Kiwi who at least knew who the stranger was but I also didn't mention that the dinner was to celebrate beating the Kiwis in an exhibition match :rofl
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 06, 2003
Flame Wars...
On MacSlash there was an article about the fact that Adobe has decided to publish some PC vs Mac benchmarks to demonstrate that the PC is faster for some tasks that a Mac. The reason for interest in the claim is that it coincided with Adobe promoting the sale of DELL PCs. The suggestion was that perhaps the choice of what benchmarks to publish may have been influenced by commercial realities.
This rapidly degenerated into a flame war between PC and Mac bigots each trying to claim that either they had a "bigger one" or "wider one" or "faster one" or "more handsome one" or something.
An annonymous coward published the following perfect (unedited) comment:
OK, everybody, the reality check has bounced.
Now, simmer down and repeat after me:
IT'S JUST A FREAKIN' BOX OF ELECTRONIC PARTS THAT WAS OBSOLETE BEFORE IT SHIPPED TO ME. MY COMPUTER CHOICE IS INSIGNIFICANT IN THE LARGER SCHEME OF THE COSMOS. I WILL FIND SOMETHING MEANINGUL FOR MY LIFE OTHER THEN BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT WHICH COMPUTER IS FASTER OR BETTER BECAUSE MY LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO SPEND IT FLAMING MESSAGE BOARDS WITH MY IGNORANT AND/OR INSIGNIFICANT EPHEMORAL OPINION.
Now, don't you feel better?
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 05, 2003
Icons?
Ever wondered what some of those symbols mean? You know, the symbols that are used as "universal" pictograms that replace words. Everyone recognises the one that says put red electrical tape over and around anyone who smokes....
Well a helpful site has put up the explanations for all the new icons that are used to explain terrorism. My favourite has to be the one for "Don't run if you set yourself on fire" which looks like this:
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (3)
February 04, 2003
101 Dumbest Moments in Business
For eveything under the sun there is somebody watching, collecting statistics and making lists. This one is the list of the 101 dumbest moments in Business for 2003.
The company we all loved to hate has 7 entries (more than any other single organization including MacDonalds). This includes entries #48, #49, #50, #51 which are all related to the promotion (demotion) of ".NOT". Entry #41 was related to the aborted campaign to spread graffiti all over New York to promote "MSN 8".
Entry #11:
Whiffed pitch No. 2: swiping your competitor's idea and completely screwing it up.
In an attempt to blunt Apple's (AAPL) "Switch" campaign, Microsoft posts a page on its website, titled "Confessions of a Mac to PC Convert," featuring a woman touting the Windows XP operating system. It's soon revealed, however, that the woman pictured is a model and the touting comes from a freelance writer paid by Gates & Co.
And the highest scoring entry for MicroSlosh is #5:
Celebrating the can-do spirit that continues to make American capitalism the envy of the world.
At a developers conference in September, Microsoft (MSFT) senior vice president Brian Valentine describes the state of the art in OS security: "Every operating system out there is about equal.... We all suck."
Speak for yourself Brian!
Also worthy of comment at #31 is the "Dude! You're getting a Cell!" episode.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 03, 2003
What can I say....
Apparently someone has found yet another exploit when you use Windows for real work on the Internet. First use of the exploit was in the .mil domain.
All together now ....
1 ...
2 ...
3 ...
Here's a nickel son, get yourself a real computer! (from Dilbert)
Could be a Mac, could be Linux, could even be a Sun box - just stop running toy systems in the real world. Cool for games, and fiddling but uncool for the military.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM | Comments (1)
February 02, 2003
Singalong...
While I was off sick, a friend sent me this lovely (catchy) song. It goes to the tune of "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands":
If You're Happy And You Know It, Bomb Iraq
If you cannot find Osama, Bomb Iraq
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
and North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.
If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think that someone's dissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.
It's pre-emptive non-aggression, bomb Iraq.
To prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons that we can't see,
And that's all the proof that we need,
If they're not there,then they MUST be there,
Bomb Iraq.
If you never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If you think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
And he tried to kill your dad,
Bomb Iraq.
If corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding cash connections ain't easy,
And your accountants getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.
Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree?.... We'll call it treason,
Let's make war, not love this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.
Posted by Peskie at 12:00 PM
February 01, 2003
Pest Toast
The Pest has been date set to mark the beginning of the original blog. It is likely to get quite lonely as I start to prune and clean up older entries.
According to MT, at the start of October 2005 there were:
Total Entries: 3826
Total Comments: 4228
I figure 2500 entries is a lot and so I have started pruning the deadwood. I guess the web is like that - now you see it, now you don't.
I will keep entries that generated lots of *real* comments - so if you see a post you like, better leave a comment :-)
Extended Pesting....
Posted by Ozguru at 12:00 AM | Comments (2)