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August 12, 2003

Marketing Techniques and Terminology

The buzz word in today's business world is MARKETING. However, people often confuse marketing, spam, public relations, advertising and sales, etc., so here is a simple explanation of "Marketing."

OK, let's suppose you're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed." That's Advertising.

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Telemarketing.

You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, "May I," and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed." That's Public Relations.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, "I hear you're fantastic in bed." That's Brand Recognition.

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend. That's Sales.

Your friend can't satisfy him so she calls you. That's Tech Support.

You're on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you're passing. So you climb onto the roof and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" That's Spam.

You are at a party, this well-built man walks up to you and gropes your breast and grabs your ass. That's Arnold Schwarzenegger!

You liked it, but 20 years later your attorney decides you were offended. That's America!

[Found at Utterly Boring.]

Posted by Peskie at August 12, 2003 12:00 PM

Comments

As an ad guy, I ought to take offense, but frankly, things couldnt have been made more lucid.

Posted by: Ravages at May 31, 2004 04:05 AM